Is it me or am I starting to give up on life?

I'm really serious about this. 

For a while, I've been starting to have a hard time finding passion in anything worth doing. It's so difficult for me to be scared about anything honestly. A month into college and I started not caring about anything. There have been some good times and bad times but, I don't know. 

I'm scared. I'm not motivated to do anything. Nothing so far has mentally stimulated me to do anything.

I feel dead on the inside. 

My dad asked me to write an essay about why I want to be a doctor. I want to but... I don't have the reason known to me why I want to. Maybe I just don't know yet but right now, I have nothing. 

This scares me. Normally, I'm passionate in what and who I love. It's as if a part of me is gone and now I have to find it. 

I want something to spark that passion in me. 

I want to look forward to something,

I want something that will make me feel excited and happy and passionate about life.

Because I feel dead on the inside.