Winter break is over... And wow I'm not starting off to a good start...
I have this one roommate that annoys me so much. She says that she can't sleep with my light on but when she leaves her light on for the whole night, it's so fucking difficult to sleep for me, especially since I have 8 AM classes. I can't really complain about it because I have a feeling that she'll complain again. Sigh... Guess I gotta go back to studying late again...
I haven't been eating a lot lately but I know my appetite will come back soon haha. I just need to walk around a lot more since all I did for a majority of break was lie down on my couch/bed and watch anime.
Recently one of my best friends decided that I'd be happier without him in my life (yah I'm finally talking about it dude lol). I have mixed feelings about it, most of it feeling really sad but I'm trying to see it in a positive light. I didn't really have time to talk about it with him because he just dropped the bomb on me and then all these feels came out. Everything came out and the next thing you know, no more communication between us. It's been a week so far since I've talked to him and I have some questions. Are we temporarily not talking to each other until he comes back from his mission? Can I still be on his email list and get emails from him when he goes back to his mission? Can I at least message/email him on holidays and his birthday? Did he pick his ex over me (this was back in high school) because I changed into a completely different person when I like someone or is it because she helped him in math or is it both? I am so confused... (If you're reading this dude, pls answer me. I'm confused af but I can't ask you because you said that you won't reply to my messages and snaps (;_;) Going back to why I'm feeling more sad than happy about it is because I miss him a butt ton. There's so many memes I want to tag him in and tell him and my other best friends a bunch of random stuff that happens in my life but I can't because there's no point in doing them if he won't see them anyway. Especially when I'll go through a rough time and he won't be there for me... Yeah I have my other best friends but he's one of the few people I feel comfortable around. But it's ok... I kinda feel like being around him reminds him of bad times. I forgave him for what he did but he can't forgive himself. So I guess he needs time to forgive himself... And he did say that he's doing this because he loves me. (Right? Sorry you know I'm pretty bad processing stuff like this lol) Ah well I think at this point from all the letters I've written to him that I do too. Welp.
Oh well... let's just see how life goes on this semester. Gotta be more productive and get my shit together~
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